guy:

i’m actually pretty cool just give me like 5 tries to get it right

officersneepsnop:

the first step to any murder is to have fun and be yourself

hooddoggy:

i want to get so good at giving sly digs that you dont even realize i insulted you until like a week later when you randomly start crying while eating breakfast

ewok-gia:

*flicks holy water on you* leave

deprincessed:

shopping rule no.1: if it’s not black put it back on the rack

nutthing:

r u a sofa bc ur sofaking annoying